More About Kim

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Hi! I've decided to be brave, and add some personal information about me... here for all to see. It's a shame that being TransGendered has to be so secretive. Anyway, on this page you'll find out more about me... some of who I am, what I like to do, what I think, etc. Here's some broad categories:

In addition, there are other pages that tell more about me. Here's a quick overview:

So, without further ado, here are some things that I believe in, what I like, or whatever... without giving away too much of who I am. Maybe there will be a day where this society accepts diversity to a greater level... Besides, a girl's got to have some secrets! ;-)


My Philosophy

[DANGER: Kim's Philosophies are ahead... sickness bags are not provided. Please skip to the next topic if peace, love, and understanding aren't your interest. Thank you, and have a nice day... ]

Even though it's become a cliche, I strongly believe that we must think globally. I try to be aware of the fact that I share this beautiful planet; not only with other humans, but also with all life. We are all part of one big, connected system; and we make a difference through what we do. I think it's better to promote love and tolerance than hate and bigotry-- everyone's entitled to their opinion and way of life; as long as it doesn't hurt others. I realize this is perhaps a bit blindly optimistic, but it's a philosophy I try to live by.

Influences on My Philosophy

The following lyrics from I Ain't Movin', a song by Des'ree and J.S. Haynes, from an album of the same name, have influenced my philosophy:

Love is my passion
Love is my friend
Love is universal
Love never ends
Then why am I faced with so much anger so much pain?
Why should I hide?
Why should I be ashamed?
Time is much too short to be living somebody else's life
I walk with dignity, I step with pride

Cause I ain't movin' from my face, from my race, from my history
I ain't movin' from my love, my peaceful dove, it means too much to me
Loving self can be so hard
Honesty can be demanding
Learn to love yourself it's a great, great feeling

While I'm not terribly religious, I do so love this Irish Blessing.

While I don't really believe in any zodiac or astrology, I like comparing who I think I am with what my sign says about me. After all, this is the age of Aquarius. ;-). My Celtic zodiac symbol is The Rowan.

Top (Back to the Introduction)


I have managed to reach being an activist (I was WebMistress for It's Time, Oregon-- a political action site-- at one point :). As I accept being TG more in myself and tell more people, I do want the right to do, and dress, as I please as long as it doesn't hurt others [but then I imagine that you surmised that from my main page already :-)]. In fact, it's NOT as hard as you might think to be an activist. Part of becoming an activist for me has been a process of overcoming my fears, and posting things that people might recognize in the male side of me.

The theme of overcoming fears and speaking out is echoed in the words of poet Audre Lorde (from "The Transformation of Silence into Language and Action" in Sister Outsider):

"...what I most regretted were my silences. 
Of what had I ever been afraid? 
To question or to speak as I believed could have meant pain, 
or death... 
I was going to die, if not sooner then later, 
whether or not I had ever spoken 
myself.  My silences had not protected me. 
Your silence will not protect you."

For those of you not convinced of the need to stand up for yourself and others, then where does the prejudiced line of thinking stop...

"...[They] came for the Communists, 
	and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Communist. 
Then they came for the Jews, 
	and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Jew.
Then they came for the trade unionists, 
	and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a trade unionist.
Then they came for the Catholics, 
	and I didn't speak up because I was a Protestant. 
Then they came for me, 
	and by that time there was no one left to speak up for me."
		-- Martin Niemöller

...and more importantly, how do we work to stop it?


My Interests

Here's where you may or may not learn more about who I am... I love all kinds of people, activities, music, movies, food, exercise, and places.

People. It's the classic cliche, but I really am a "people person." Some say it's part of my Aquarian nature, but I'm more inclined to place it on growing up in a loving household, and my general biochemical or genetic personality traits. Anyway, my idea of fun varies from...

Activities. Since there's so many to mention, here's a few of the top ones... :)

Music. I like all kinds of music. I like Bonnie Raitt, Mozart, Pearl Jam, Paula Cole, BB King, Melissa Etheridge, Fiona Apple, the Crash Test Dummies, Sting, Gin Blossoms, U2... well, you get the idea. Just about the only sort of music I don't really like is rap; but some of that's okay. I guess really twangy country music is out too...

Movies. Well, my favorite of all time is "The Princess Bride." What more could one want from a movie than romance, comedy, adventure, suspense, mystery, and "wuv, twu wuv..."? After that, I'd say I like all kinds of genre's; science fiction, romance, drama, action, etc. Movies like Star Wars, Like Water for Chocolate, The Usual Suspects, Indiana Jones, Terminator, The Jungle Book, etc.

Food As Oliver says... Food, glorious food! I get the 3 basic food groups in: pasta, potatoes, and pizza (Yes, Kim is a carbo junkie). I love spicy foods like Indian and Thai. A good Mexican or Texas Chili dish is fun... and so are Chinese, French, and just about anything else.

Exercise. With all that eating, it's a good thing I exercise. I do step aerobics... and I'm really glad to see more men out doing it. Maybe the silly stereotypes and roles of our society are beginning to give way to a more enlightened view.... Oooops. There goes the raging activist in me again. Sorry. Anyway, I also like to run, play volleyball, softball, etc.-- and yes, this is almost more exercise than activity for me...

Places. My favorite place to be is probably wherever my family and friends are... or where I can be alone in the peaceful serenity of the Earth (or, when pressed to admit it, at a party, even when I don't know many people there). I enjoy the coast and the mountains. I enjoy big cities for the art museums, interesting architecture, great restaurants, etc. I also enjoy small towns. Most importantly, though, I try to enjoy any place that I'm at...


My Online Identities

I started this website long before there were social networking sites like facebook, myspace, etc.; even before trans networking sites like URNotAlone. So this site is my home, and the place that I update people on my goings on most often.

However, even though this is probably the main site I still update (and where I pour out my heart in my Blog :), I do realize that many of my friends are taking advantage of these online social networking sites, and that they can even make my job of updating the world about me easier. After all, not everyone wants to learn and 'hack' HTML directly, and figure out how to upload it to a website.

So, below, is a list of some of my other online identities and sites. I have only given a sample of my identities, because I'm not too anxious to 'expose' my online identity to simply anyone; some of the sites are for me and my friends to stay connected. So if you're a friend of mine, you're hopefully already a 'friend' on the social networking sites I have, or we will become friends there soon... :)


Quotes I Like

I like this quote attributed to Chief Seattle:

All things are bound together
All things connect
What happens to the Earth
Happens to the children of the Earth
People have not woven the Web of life
Each is but one thread
Whatever we do to the Web,
We do to ourselves
-- Chief Seattle, 1855 (adaptation by s.g., 1991)

Some other interesting quotes...

If high heels were so wonderful, men would be wearing them. --Sue Grafton
It is never too late to be what you might have been --George Eliot (the pen name of Mary Ann Evans, English Novelist)
To be nobody but yourself – in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else – means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. --E.E. Cummings
Two roads diverged in the wood, and I- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. --Robert Frost

Miscellaneous Quotebag

In fact, I've been slowly collecting quotes from various sources, and you can find a bunch of my favorites on the Miscellaneous Quotes page.


A Rose By Any Other Name

As Shakespeare asked: "What's in a name?" What do my names mean? Well, it depends upon the way you spell them, and which source you use...

For my first name, Kim, you might wish to know it's a unisex name; the 59th most popular one at that. If you want to look up your own name, try going to a search engine (e.g. Google, Yahoo, HotBot, Excite, Lycos, etc.) and type in "baby name list." There are lots of baby name services out there now. In any case, here's some meanings of my first name for you:

Kimberley, a [female] name of Old English origin, means: Of the royal fortress/forest (other sources say it means royally born, diamonds, diamond-filled rock, Leader of the Warriors, etc. ;-). About 7% of people with this name spell it "Kimberley". It was 592nd in popularity for females of all ages in a sample of the 1990 US Census (24th for Kimberly), and didn't rank among the 6,000 names for boys. No wonder people assume I'm female from my name... :)

Believe it or not, this is my given name... :) [Yes, that means I had the luck of having a female name to use for this side of me.] By the way, Kimberley is actually derived from Cyneburg leah, an Old English phrase meaning "Cyneburg's field." Cyneburg (meaning 'royal forest') was an Old English personal name. In time, the place name identifying Cyneburg's holdings evolved into its present form of Kimberley. [This info is from]

Kim, a unisex name of Old English origin, means: Glorious ruler; noble; brave. Kim's ethnic backgrounds include English/Welsh [and is related to my father's name]. Kim is the 59th most popular unisex name, ranked 118th for girls and 397th for boys in the 1990 US census.

How about my middle name? Well, this is the one that I actually picked myself... :) The meaning is:

Anne, an alternate spelling of Ann; which is a name of Hebrew and Greek origin, meaning: Favored grace or mercy. Ann's ethnic backgrounds include Swedish, English/Welsh, Scottish. Anne is the 85th most popular girl's name (Ann is 48th) in 1990. [A full meaning is sometimes given as 'God has graced me with a son.', and a related name is the Irish Gaelic Aine, meaning 'Brilliant.' :)]

How about my last name? Well, I must admit that this is an ancestral name I take pride in (and not my actual last name). The McNelis' are sort of like "Smith" in the Ardara area of county Donegal, in the NorthWest corner of Ireland... and it's a proud name with a long history.


The Facts

"Just the facts, ma'am." For those of you dying to know, here's some statistics about me:

Height5 feet, 9 inches (1.75 or so meters)
WeightMore than a breadbasket
Eye ColorBlue
Hair ColorRed,Blonde, Black, or whatever mood I happen to be in! (I like being a redhead a lot! :)

The following are some answers from a "friendship" quiz you're supposed to send all your friends:

01. What time is it:  12:20 am
02. Name you like to be called by: Kimberley
03. Nicknames: Kim, etc.
04. Parent's names:  [snip]
05. Number of candles that appeared on your last birthday cake? Top Secret ;-)
06. Day that you regularly blow them out?  January
07. Pets: N/A (none)
08. Height:   5' 9"
09. Eye color:  Blue
10. Hair Color: Varies w/my mood...
11. Piercing: Yes! [Ears :)]
12. Tattoos?  None
13. Do you love your job (1 to 10): Hmmmnnnn... Varies from 7 to 9
14. Birthplace:  [snip]
15. Hometown: Salem-area, Oregon
16. Current Residence: Portland-area, Oregon
17. Been in love before? Yes.
18. Been to Europe? Yes (Ireland, England, Scotland, France, Italy, Switzerland, Germany)
19. Been toilet-papering? No... (and don't want to, either ;-)
20. Been toilet-papered?  No... (and don't want it, either ;-)
21. Loved somebody so much it made you cry? Yes.
22. Been in a car crash?  Yes; not hurt terribly tho'.
23. Croutons or Bacon Bits?  Croutons (Bacon Bits? Yuck.)
24. 2 doors or 4 (on a car)? 2!!
25. Coffee or Ice Cream?  Definately ice cream!
26. Blanket or Stuffed Animal:  Stuffed animal
27. Dumper or Dumpee? Yes (Both) 
28. Salad Dressing: Honey Mustard, Balsamic Vinagrette, etc.
29. Favorite color:  Purple!!
31. Place to be kissed: Anywhere... (well, almost anywhere ;-)
32. Movie: "Princess Bride" and a bazillion others!
33. Musical Group: Hmmnn... Very eclectic for me. Too many to chose one.
34. Favorite Holiday: Christmas, I think... It's about family 
    togetherness for my family. [Halloween is a favorite too... :)]
35. Foods: Anything with potatoes or starch (aka Italian food) in it-- though Thai, 
    Indian, and Greek are high on the list.
36. Day of the Week:  Sunday
37. Song at the moment:  No single song...
38. TV Show:   TV? [Almost never touch the stuff ;-)]
39. Toothpaste: Aquafresh or Colgate.
40. Restaurant:  Hmmnnn... Il Piato. Pazzo. Thai Orchid. Saucebox.
41. Flower: Rose (or maybe Orchid)
42. Least Favorite Thing:  Closed-minded people
43. Favorite Sport to watch:  Power shopping or People-watching (do more than watch ;-)
44. Fast Food Restaurant: Blech.
45. When was your last hospital visit? May, 2002 [Anaphylactic shock from an 
    unknown allergen]
46. Favorite Drink: Oreo shake?
47. What color is your bedroom's carpet?  Brown
48. How many times did you fail your Permit and/or Drivers License test?  N/A (None).
49. What do you think of Ouija boards?   I don't mess with them.
50. Where do see yourself in 10 yrs?  In 10 years? Heck, I can't even see 10 days ahead! ;-)
51. Who is the last person that emailed you before this one? Like I'd remember?
52. Have you ever been convicted of a crime? Nope.
53. Which store would you choose to max your credit card?  None.
54. What do you do most often when you are bored? Tie between talk to friends, 
    go shopping, surf the net, and see a movie. 
55. What words or phrases do you overuse? "I could tell you, but I'd have to kill you."
56. Friend who lives farthest away:  In Germany.
57. Most annoying thing: Injustice (or lack of integrity).
58. Best thing: Love (twu wuv ;-)
59. Bedtime: After 11
60. Favorite city? Portland, Oregon
61. What would be your ideal vacation? A year (or so) to travel the globe... 
    and have a job (that I like) soon afterwards-- either my current one, or a new one. 
62. Car you drive?  Mazda MX-5 Miata.
63. What kind would you like to drive? Mazda Miata (or Porsche 911 or Boxster :)
64. Favorite color of lipstick?  Bistro Burgundy by Covergirl
65. Nail polish or press-ons?  Polish
66. Beer or wine?   Wine (or microbrew on occassion)
67. Favorite gemstone?  Either Amethyst, Garnet, Moonstone, or Tanzanite.
68. Who will respond to this fastest?  N/A.
69. Who is the person you sent this to that is least likely to respond?  N/A.
70. What time is it now? 12:45 am... (after looking for my lipstick ;-)



small yin-yang trans-sphere I've been accepted to the Global TransGendeRing , and my Yin-Yang TG symbol (based on one created by Holly Boswell and popularized by Nancy R. Nangeroni ) has been accepted as one to choose from for the ring! I feel honored... :)


I have a page on site visit statistics, doing a quick analysis of where (and inference of why) people visit on my site. So if you're curious to learn more details of where people visit on my site, and what I think about it, please see more on my Site Statistics page.


The website has a Gender Test Center (by Jennifer Diane Reitz ) that has the "COmbined Gender Identity And Transsexuality Inventory (COGIATI)". I am not linking to the test itself, because I would encourage you to read the intro and disclaimers. In fact, I strongly urge you to treat the 'test' as more of a form of entertainment than scientific predictor, because I believe it is mostly for entertainment purposes. I think it can (perhaps at its best) stir self-reflection and get people thinking about the gender spectrum and their own identity in perhaps new ways.

Anyway, I have taken the test several times (and it has changed over time some, I think). In the past I think it said I am TS, or close (closer) to the TS spectrum than it now says. So, again, I think this says something about the test as entertainment, and food for thought, and NOT a 'predictor' of gender identity or gender path.

OK, with the disclaimers out of the way, the COGIATI 'predicted' for me, on April 10, 2009 the following:


Your COGIATI result value is: 40

Which means that you fall within the following category: COGIATI classification THREE, ANDROGYNE

What this means is that the Combined Gender Identity And Transsexuality Inventory has classified your internal gender identity to be essentially androgynous, both male and female at the same time, or possibly neither. In some cultures in history, you would be considered to be a third sex, independent of the polarities of masculine or feminine. Your gender issues are intrinsic to your construction, and you will most likely find your happiness playing with expressing both genders as you feel like it.


Your situation is a little tricky in our current society, but not tremendously so, depending on your geographic location.

The suggestions for your circumstance are not overly complicated:

  1. If you have any comfortability about your gender expression, some slight degree of counseling might well prove helpful. The primary goal would be to make it possible for you to enjoy your gender expressions free from any shame or embarrassment, and to resolve any remaining questions you might have.
  2. As an androgynous being, both genders, and both sexes are natural to your expression. Permanent polarization in either direction might bring significant unhappiness. It is not recommended that you go through a complete transsexual transformation. You might find a partial transformation of value, if you find yourself more attracted overall to the feminine. You are more likely a transgenderist, than a transsexual. It is recommended that you recognize that your gender issues are real, but that extreme action regarding them should be viewed with great caution.
  3. If you have not already, consider joining any of the thousands of groups devoted to gender play of various varieties. There is literally a world of friends to discover who share your interests. There are also publications, vacations, and activities that would expand your gender play.


So, there you have it. I'm an androgyne, androgynous, gender-queer (GenderQueer or GQ ;-) person... that happens to lean much more heavily to cross-dresser (transvestite) or 'average guy' in appearance most of the time.


The results of a fun little quiz on what type of lesbian I am:

You scored as The Sprightly Elfin Femme. Cute and irresistible, you inspire and foster the little kid in everyone.

The Sprightly Elfin Femme


The Femme Fatale


The Quasi-Gothic Femme


The Student Dyke


The Stud


The Surprise! Dyke


The Granola Dyke


The Bohemian Dyke


The Vaginal-Reference-Making Dyke


The Pretty-Boi Dyke


The Magic Earring Ken Dyke


The Little-Boy Dyke


The Hipster Dyke


What Type of Lesbian Are You? (Inspired by Curve Mag.)
created with


The results of a fun little girlish/boyish quiz on the site:

You Are 50% Boyish and 50% Girlish
You are pretty evenly split down the middle - a total eunuch.
Okay, kidding about the eunuch part. But you do get along with both sexes.
You reject traditional gender roles. However, you don't actively fight them.
[Editorial: Actually, yes, I do fight them sometimes ;-)]
You're just you. You don't try to be what people expect you to be.
How Boyish or Girlish Are You?


I took a quiz at, which was OK, and here's what is said: "YOUR RESULT: Perfectly Balanced. Your level of masculinity or femininity depends on the circumstance. You like to do things that are 'girly,' but you can also be super-assertive when necessary."

The results of quiz on what type of religion I am. I think I actually am agnostic at the moment (and have been pretty much my whole life... I'm not so sure about the rest ;-):

You scored as agnosticism. You are an agnostic. Though it is generally taken that agnostics neither believe nor disbelieve in God, it is possible to be a theist or atheist in addition to an agnostic. Agnostics don't believe it is possible to prove the existence of God (nor lack thereof). Agnosticism is a philosophy that God's existence cannot be proven. Some say it is possible to be agnostic and follow a religion; however, one cannot be a devout believer if he or she does not truly believe.



















Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
created with


The results of an action hero quiz on the site (Okay, so I slightly tweaked some of the answers either in favor of whom I'd like to be, or what I thought might get me a Lara Croft; such as 'two guns are always better than one') [I'll admit that I'd be happy to look like Angelina Jolie :)]:

You scored as Lara Croft. A thrill-seeking, slightly unscrupulous, tough-as-nails archaeologist, Lara Croft travels the world in search of ancient relics perhaps better left hidden. She packs two Colt .45s and has no fear of jumping off buildings, exploring creepy tombs, or taking on evil meglomaniacs bent on world domination.

Lara Croft


Captain Jack Sparrow


William Wallace




Indiana Jones


El Zorro


Neo, the "One"


James Bond, Agent 007


The Terminator


Batman, the Dark Knight


The Amazing Spider-Man


Which Action Hero Would You Be? v. 2.0
created with


The results of a super hero quiz on the site say I'm Wonder Woman, though followed closely by Superman, Spider-Man, and Supergirl. So I found it interesting and refreshing that both genders are represented in the quiz. [I'll admit that I'd be happy to be Wonder Woman, or look like Linda Carter :)]:

Your results:
You are Wonder Woman
Wonder Woman
The Flash
Green Lantern
Iron Man
You are a beautiful princess
with great strength of character.
Click here to take the Superhero Personality Quiz



My Yahoo Avatar might give some impression of my current mood, a current thought, or simply that I've decided to 'play dress up' and try something fun.

Kimberley McNelis' Yahoo! Avatar... click to go to Yahoo Avatars in a new window


I have a profile on UR Not Alone, and here's a picture from there of where I live (more-or-less):


I have a Frappr Map (in Beta as of 1/20/2007). I'm not sure what all it is or how it works, and it seems fun! :) [I think you can add yourself to my map by clicking on the "Add Yourself" picture near the upper-left; it's sort of like a guestbook...]


I have a "Hot Or Not" rating page for those of you purely into the visual. However, I will warn you that clicking on a rating and seeing results (instant gratification) can be addictive. For more, please see my My Hot or Not Rating Page.


In Conclusion...

Well, that's some about me... about what I value. I hope that gives you a better idea of who I am, and... Hello? [DARN... bored another visitor to sleep... ]


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This page last updated on 21 January, 2008.
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